Getting Yourself a Wossname Sometime

[mirospsyche]

(Thread 3 in The Getting Yourself a Something a Number of Times Series)

Warning: Spoilers abound.

Order of the Silver Wossname

For destroying both sides in the Great War between the Hippies and Frat Orcs, you have been awarded the Kingdom of Loathing's most prestigious decoration. In fact, it's been so long since the last time it was awarded, that no one can quite remember what the curious engravings on the medallion are meant to represent. Still though, it's quite an honor.

Type: accessory
Mysticality Required: 85
Selling Price: 15000 Meat.
Cannot be traded

    Enchantment:
    All Attributes +11
    +11% Item Drops from Monsters
    +11% Meat from Monsters

NOTE: You may not equip more than one of this item at a time.

Welcome!

If you run Mafia, don't turn away.
This post may help you if you want a Wossname Mafia script (or Mafia Wossname script). The latest version can be seen here. 

If you do not run Mafia, don’t turn away.
Getting the Wossname still is manageable.

If you be a bumbling bee, don't turn away.
Just because. Humor me.

A brief rundown of things to do:

• Get to level 12, at least. Visit the Council. (You won't be assigned the quest unless you have adventured in the Palindome.)
• Make sure to get a flaregun from the Cove, especially if you don't have access to the Mall or your whole inventory. Pirates disappear during the war–– a-gallivanting or sleeping off hangovers.
• Start the war.
• Decide on a method you would use to get the Wossname. Included in the file are guides for setting up the Battlefield in 254 turns (wiki-dubbed as the “fastest”), 1998 turns (“simplest”), 262 turns (“simpler”), and 528 turns (“better rewards”). The rewards section may help you decide. Note that if you defeat both armies, the Arena will be deserted after the war.
  
  • These numbers are not canon; there are various ways of finishing off the 1998 units and 6 sidequests. You may adjust if you make a mistake, or follow/devise an altogether different method. 
  • Data for the number of units that needs beating up for image numbers to change come from here.
• Stick to the method you choose. A little care goes far.
• More reminders:
  
  • Get acknowledgement for sidequests done! A way to make sure is to pester the people-in-distress until you are first given a reward.
  • The non-combats that give you combat items when you first hit the Battlefield are not included in the 999/999 count. 
  • CLEESHed or Special Holiday monsters also do not count towards the 999/999.
  • Both armies have “heroes” that drop special items (at a 100% drop rate). Heroes appear late in the battle, when fights are harder. Should a hero’s drop interest you, you may follow this tactic.
• When you reach the cells asking you to STOP, stop. They’re not kidding. Hover your cursor over the Battlefield and check the image names of the Frat and Hippy sides. Both should end in 31.gif, and have one remaining unit each. Yeba! You're nearly done!
• Trade in your rings, beads or extra war gear for quarters and dimes and buy stuff from the army shops. Reserve at least a full set of war outfit.
• Click on the Battlefield image (not the link below the “Last Adventure” link). You should meet The Big Wisniewski and The Man bickering in The Last Stand, a choice adventure. (Heroes have been known to override this encounter. If this happens, run away or CLEESH the villain.) Choose to attack either Wisniewski or The Man.
• Combat! Whip out your flaregun and use it in combat, the rain and tears mingling on your face notwithstanding. You should get reinforcements, explosions, some slow-mo… drama. And both HQs are bombed back to the stone age. Ended the Frat-Hippy War, you have, you heroic hero you! How… climactically... awesome.
• Yay you! Hop back to the Council and get decorated with your shimmering, shining-- Uhh, what’s it called again?

Thank you for reading up to this exclamation point!
Have fun.

[Mandoline]

yay for a very nicely tutorial!
For uber-lazy people using Mafia, Zarqon has done a great job - I got myself several using the OCW several times, and, yes, it works very nicely!
Paper and pen is more tedious, but also works.
But, after a few ascensions, anyone can get it without hassle.
Personally, I wish I knew the things you mentioned on the last sheet of the Excel file ("1998 turns") - very useful for cutting corners when looking for speed, for instance, starting a subquest "in disguise" - it really helps. Dressed as hippy, kill all the drones AND queen while flyering them (can be done right after starting the war) and only ask for the reward when the area opens later, for frat boys.

A "you can only wear one" item that is worth all the hubbub

[mirospsyche]

Mando, thank you.


I hope others may find some use for this post, if only for comic relief.

[scorch]

I know this is well past the reply time, but being new and having something on topic to say, i decided to reply.

It's extremly time consuming, but fighting off every single soldier in both armies one by one can turn out to be very rewarding, as you get more war spoils and have an increased chance of fighting a war hero (i fought 2 hippy heroes and a frat hero this way. Also the spoils of war you don't like can also be traded for war stiens in the frat house or necklaces in the hippy camp, worth 1000 meat each. These items cost 5 dimes or 5 quarters, and can make rediculous amounts of meat during the quest.

But remember your flaregun, i didn't and nearly screwed it up. I would have been screwed if hardcore.